Maddie Mo-nitor

Maddie Mo-nitor
From the Inside Looking Out?

Friday, August 22, 2008

Maddie Mo Masse'

As I was emailing my parents to thank them for the extremely hilarious birthday eCard they sent me, what was supposed to be a thankyou "note" turned into a short story about none other than my sweet feline companion, Maddie (short for Madeline) Mo (short for Morgan) Masse' (a difficult type of shot in the game of pool where you have to curve the cue ball around your oponents ball to ultimately hit your ball) Obviously I love the game of pool so much I had to somehow incorporate it into my cat's name! LOL! Anyway, this is the letter I sent my folks yesterday. They got a kick out of it and also being huge cat lovers, could totally relate to my story. I have no doubt you will as well! Dear Mom and Dad;

Thankyou soooooo much for the great card, money, and beautiful teapot! I needed that break from work to just laugh.
I am having a great birthday. I have been working away at my new web business and feel like I am getting everywhere and nowhere at the same time! UGH! AND, I have to do this all the while my little princess and "cat"shadow constantly claws away at my consentration. A slight moan here or a loud groan there. It's a never ending effort to center my attention to who, is, afterall, the center of the universe - Maddie the Cat of course!

This being said, she is never out of my sight, always at my side, and never ever satisfied with the "round the clock" attention she really and truly gets! And yes, if she was totally running the show I would be throwing a ball around the house all day instead of "playing around" on my computer! No sooner did I write those words and I am honored with my hourly little "whine" along with the sweet squinting glance of her eyes --a mezmorizing look that delivers such greatful thoughts and blessful feelings each and every time I see it.
As I come out of my trance I come to realize that this little stinker knows exactly what she is doing. She knows I can't look at that face of hers and not fall in love every time!
God, she is so funny! As I sit here writing (aka ignoring her!), she has to behave in ways she knows are bad (good) and definitely going to drive me crazier than I already am--pushing, persisting, knowing it's only a matter of time before her goal is met!

When you think about it (and one would ONLY think about this if you are nuts like me) then it totally makes sense where the word "meow" is derived! It's the words "ME NOW" all wrapped up into its "lazy" yet "actively" inclusive and slang version of which becomes "meow"! To actually have a theory on something like this should be the clincher for anyone reading this who had any doubt whatsoever that I need serious help!LOL!

Maddie did a very good "me now" thing the other day and led me to her ball, (or led me to believe she did) which had been missing for a week (on purpose) and was the grand diversion tactic of the day. When we were playing with her ball the week prior, it had magically disappeared to underneath the desk against the wall and under the curtain. It's amazing how you can see the ball roll under the desk, but when you break your back to retrieve it, somehow it has vanished. It's like the sock that always disappears in the dryer. You know you put two in there, but only one comes out. The sock has gone to "dryer abyss" and may or may not ever return! If the sock you lost a month ago does show back up, it isn't questioned. It is just understood. No sweat had to be conjured up over the sock.

The BIG difference betwee the sock and the ball is that I will practically cripple myself every time trying to find the ball. It should be very apparent by now who comes first in my house! This, being the true definition of insanity.

Well, as insane as this is, it just so happens that the other day Maddie decides to wake from a dead sleep - - in a flash she makes her way behind all of my files which are or rather were situated on the lower level of my desk. She adimantly pushes her way behind everything and starts scratching and batting her paws down toward the floor (only a couple of inches below) while almost pulling the curtains down along side my newly scattered files. Trying to think positively, I say to myself, "Great! It's a spider. Get it girl!" But at the same time I'm also saying to myself, "Shoot, she's wrecking the house!" So, I am compelled to stop everything in order to focus on the HUGE situation at hand (or paw).
Low and behold! It's not a spider! It's not a bird! It's not a plane! It's her ball! I'm pretty sure she was saving this one up for the perfect "you've been ignoring me WAY too long" opportunity! And, what's hilarious is that she always tries using a trick such as this one more than once! Of course, the second time is usually and most always a bluff! That's what she did a minute ago. I said, "Maddie, good try." She just gave me a little whiny meow and immediately went to her very own special chair right next to mine seated at my desk.

Yes, her own chair. Because, before we got the chair, the performance would only proceed to the infamous endless beeping "keyboard paw press" to "how do I look while I am draped on top of these papers you're trying to read?!" So, the chair is a way for her to be inclusive, not intrusive! Don't you just love cats?!. Wonderful, isn't it? Today I turn forty-three, I am single, I am free and my best friend's a kittie, none other than my sweet Maddie!

It's my birthday and I will be a goofball if I want to! Part of my work today has been reading articles on a bunch of different "blog" sites (no, not bog, although some of them belong there!!) and thinking about what it is I can write about that would help "pre-sell" my own website's visitors. I guess I should have known all along what (or WHO) to write about. Too bad I didn't realize this before deciding that my new "dating and relationships advice" website was the way to go instead. What a dork. The funny thing is, I should be able to give advice all day long on "what NOT to do" in relationships! Isn't it Dr. Phil who says "I'd rather be happy and alone than to be with someone and miserable"? I think we ought to change that up a bit to, "I'd rather devote all my love to my cat and be happy than to be miserable with some smelly old dog!"
Ok, I'm done rambling on. And, FYI, I love all animals, including dogs. Smelly or not. I just don't like the human ones. Smelly or not! Thanks for listening!
Talk to you soon!
Kate

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